Normally, I love November.
I like the change in the weather, to chilly. I like wearing sweaters, scarves, and hats. I like watching the bright leaves escape the trees to form brown drifts in the sidewalk for shuffling crunchily through.
This year, I am not so happy. Since the 3-day, I have been in a funk. I feel behind on schoolwork, I feel behind on housework, I don’t think I ought to be turning 40 this month, and I feel really down. I haven’t felt this blue in a really long time.
I am really glad I have been through this before. I recognize this feeling. I have a loving husband who has also noticed my mood. So tomorrow I have a doctor appointment and I hope I will get some meds to help with this. I actually spent several weeks this year getting OFF meds, and I thought I was doing pretty well. I don’t know if it is the lessening of the sunlight, the sudden lack of exercise since I stopped walking so much, or just a stronger than usual school-year anxiety that is getting to me. But I know I have to do something about it.
Meanwhile, I can get a hug from my husband, eat some chocolate, and pet the cat. Tycho is on my lap purring right now, in fact!